Guess whose application was rejected? — Dear Mr. Trump: Receipt is acknowledged of your application for admittance to our new Heaven’s Gate Estates project. Thank you for the edible fruit arrangement; however, we are unable to accept any gift that might be construed as a bribe. Unfortunately, our celestial board has rejected your application. Notwithstanding your…

And it ain’t chocolates, flowers or jewelry — When you’re young and in love, nothing seems too silly or cheesy. No token of affection or sign of commitment goes ungifted or unexpressed. Yet I would say that I am far more romantic than the smitten teenager who showers his girlfriend with flowers, lockets and perfume. That’s easy. What’s…

Just take this easy quiz — For most folks, it’s easy to tell whether they’re a supporter of Donald Trump. After all, over 80% of Republicans approve of the guy. But for those who aren’t Republican and are unsure of where they stand, here’s a little test. …

Could it be a Blowhard 5? — It turns out that Hurricane Ian was the storm of a lifetime as it wreaked havoc throughout Florida and along the coast of the Carolinas. Although Ian has passed, we must remember that the hurricane season continues and more devastating storms may be on the way including this long-lingering one…

Recognizing and exploiting the non-matriculated — “…. half of all Americans who enter college never finish…..” - The New Yorker — June 6, 2011 Colleges and universities are becoming more and more reliant on alumni support to help finance their operations. At least one such institution has sought to expand its fundraising efforts by appealing to…

Pay attention to their parting words — It has been an American tradition for a departing president to address the nation and give guidance for the country’s future. George Washington famously warned against foreign entanglements, and Dwight Eisenhower urged Americans to beware of the military-industrial complex. Sadly, such advice has seldom been followed. Some lesser-known presidents also…

Another place where the sun don’t shine — Whether you own one, borrow one, or rent one, a stay at a lakeside cottage is a mandatory summer pastime. It’s as Canadian as ice skating and poutine. Since we neither inherited a cottage nor the windfall needed to buy one, we fall into the category of renters. Each year…

Much ado over one kid’s hot chocolate — I was recently reviewing my archives and ran across this essay from 15 years ago: This battle had been brewing for ages. I just didn’t expect it to erupt over a 35-cent charge for a vanilla shot. For years now, I’ve lived in an edgy state of peaceful coexistence with…

It looks like he’s no longer needed — Hi, I’m Smoking Gun. You may know me from any number of murder mysteries and old films. I played a central role many times including as a Maltese falcon, a library-based candlestick, and even an actual smoking pistol. I was honored and thrilled to expand my theatrical repertoire from the…